SFBT IS A STANCE

So, this is an exciting time for me. I am coming to you from my secret lair. I rented out a home where I’m going to be hosting my annual conference from. We’re going to be broadcasting this conference from this home. I’m super excited. The crew is coming and they’re bringing like all of their TV equipment. It’s going to be really, really awesome.

And I’m sitting and thinking about the material that we’re going to be sharing during this event. And I’m listening to some of the people kind of walk through their presentations and I’m inspired to share a message with you about Solution Focused Brief Therapy that I think is something we don’t talk enough about as educators and writers of Solution Focused Brief Therapy enough. This is a really like impactful,

important part of, of the work. But I think, I think we take it for granted, you know, people come to me and they want me to teach them the techniques of Solution Focused, you know, how do I do it? How do I do it? How do I do it? Like, how do you ask this kind of question and how do you work with this kind of client?

How do you do this type of work? And I think those were appropriate questions. I really tried to create materials to answer those questions. But the other thing that I think I have a responsibility to do is I have to share the kind of nuanced detailed, pragmatic stuff about Solution Focused Brief Therapy. And I was listening to a friend of mine, give a presentation

to the group, as we prepare for the big, massive conference coming up. It starts in like, like by the time you watch this video it will already be kicking off. And he was talking about like Solution Focused Brief Therapy is a stance. It is a way that you hold position in your session. So it is absolutely a stance of like I’m going into the session and I’m going to hold the position that my client needs to tell me the desired outcome.

And that’s what informs your desired outcome question. And that’s how we enter into these level of conversations. I’m going to hold the position that my client should give me a description of the presence of the desired outcome. And that’s how you stick with the description because you’ve just taken a stance that you’re going to do so. Like if you go into a session and you truly genuinely believe that the answer to your client’s questions,

if you truly truly believe that the solution to your client’s problem resides within them, then you’re going to treat them as such. If you go into the session, believing that they hold the key, then you’re going to ask questions that extrapolate the key from them. And that is a stance. We go into the session with this as our rock solid foundation belief.

The moment you start thinking, I need to solve the problem for them. The moment you start thinking, Oh, they need to have this, is moment. You walk away from Solution Focused Brief Therapy, and you begin to do something else. The greatest thing I want you to know about Solution Focused Brief Therapy, that it’s a decision. You make the decision to treat people in this way.

And then once you make the decision, the rest is actually quite simple. But the hard thing is recognizing this is the decision that I make. No matter how difficult the client scenario is, I’m going to remember that my client holds the key to their own salvation. I think the greatest thing I ever learned in my path of doing Solution Focused Brief Therapy is that the client does hold the answers to the desired future that they want to live in.

My job is to help them ask questions to discover that they hold the answers. And once I realize that my client’s answers were so much more profound and effective than my ideas, then my work transformed. And that’s what will happen to you. So remember, Solution Focused Brief Therapy is a stance. It’s a decision. You have to take that stance and to make that decision in each and every one of your sessions.

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